Comic Fury Webcomic Hosting - Forum search

You are not logged in. Log in, Register, More info
Forum > Search results
Pages: [1] [2] [3] [4]

Result in thread: Bad Cop Reviews
1 terms matched
21st Jul 2017, 6:32 PM #1
Gluma

User avatar
Posts: 71
Registration date: 15th Mar 2015
Location: Glorious Mother Russia
Yeah gotta keep that in mind
_______________________
image
Result in thread: Bad Cop Reviews
1 terms matched
21st Jul 2017, 6:00 PM #2
Gluma

User avatar
Posts: 71
Registration date: 15th Mar 2015
Location: Glorious Mother Russia
revzet:Alright I've decided on Fortune be Damned and House of Cards. More reviews to come!

Merged Doublepost:

Alright here's FORTUNE BE DAMNED!!

First Impressions: Indiana Jones with Animals

Writing: 4/10

Honestly, I have no clue what's going on. A few people got killed, there's animals, secret golden circle thing, and pretty boring characters. And not so much that the personalities of the characters are boring, but they all seem like the same archetype. All of them talk and walk the same way, they all fit the mood and tone of the story because they all feel like the same standard "smoker voice no nonsense male" personality. Which.... There's nothing wrong with that as long as it's not every single personality.

And another problem is the lack of exposition. I feel like this comic skipped the first immersion chapter and is throwing us into the plot with no emotional connection or idea to what is going on. "Show don't tell" doesn't mean "skip exposition". It means don't give a 2-page wall of text explaining everything, but rather have FUN telling the reader about your world and spend some time getting the reader to connect with it. Stories are like hot tubs. You don't cannon ball into it and get out. You go in slowly and sit there and enjoy it. So don't be afraid to take some time and get the readers immersed.

Art: 6/10

Not good, but improving. There's a lot of compositional issues that make the story a little hard to follow. For example in the latest page it looks more like the scene is changing rather than that character is looking at him. For some help with that I recommend checking out some YouTube channels focusing on filming, because there's a lot you can learn from it. Some of my favorites are "lessons from the screenplay" and "folding ideas".

Not much else to say besides that, I didn't take off any points for furries even though that confuses me to no end in comics (I get really caught up in the worldbuilding dynamics of those).

Organization: 6/10

I took off points because of two reasons.

The buttons on the bottom are tiny and it's annoying to zoom in on those. And the text is hard to read via mobile so took off for that too.

The other reason is for no comic summary. How am I supposed to get an idea for what I'm getting into if there's no description? Or from another direction- having no description can give the impression that the author doesn't even know what their story is about. Just throwing something up there would help.

Overall: 5.3/10

This comic has some issues but I see a lot of potential for it in the future. Keep up the good work!

EDIT: This "merged doublepost" thing sucks huh


Haha thanks man, some negative feedback is quite refreshing tbh

Well I agree on the exposition part, I should have started the story from explaining/hinting some stuff that happens as I later realised. Well its my first storytelling experience ever so I gotta learn from my mistakes and move on. Still there's some exposition coming (this year I hope). It might be I'm just asking for reviews too early on.

Not exactly sure about characters though, in the only more-or-less dialogue I tried to portray characters differently with different posture and such, can't say how well it worked since its hard to get an outside view on your own stuff, but several people spoke positively about that thing. Maybe there wasn't enough room for proper character development yet (hell some of the main cast haven't even appeared yet), and well lol, they aren't all male and don't even all smoke haha

Yeah and thanks for hints on composition, this shet is very unobvious, you pretty much can't learn it intuitively
_______________________
image
Result in thread: Bad Cop Reviews
1 terms matched
20th Jul 2017, 9:27 AM #3
Gluma

User avatar
Posts: 71
Registration date: 15th Mar 2015
Location: Glorious Mother Russia
Link in sig, its quite short tbh (I posted already)

I like your reviews man, you're not afraid to be honest about it
_______________________
image
Result in thread: Bad Cop Reviews
1 terms matched
17th Jul 2017, 8:39 PM #4
Gluma

User avatar
Posts: 71
Registration date: 15th Mar 2015
Location: Glorious Mother Russia
Could you put me in a queue for your next queue?
_______________________
image
1 terms matched
25th Jun 2017, 4:23 PM #5
Gluma

User avatar
Posts: 71
Registration date: 15th Mar 2015
Location: Glorious Mother Russia
Nice perspective and environmental art. However on last panel of the third row, the girl's silhuette foesn't really read well (it's too similar in tone with the background, gray on gray), which I think you really shoulf pay attention to. The buildings far away contrast too much whicj shouldn't be a thing with distant objects.

Also lol why is that guy on the last panel marching so funny?

---------------------------------------------------------

just click sig
_______________________
image
1 terms matched
23rd Jun 2017, 4:11 AM #6
Gluma

User avatar
Posts: 71
Registration date: 15th Mar 2015
Location: Glorious Mother Russia
Bright green dogs surely trigger me

If they had acid anime hairstyles as well, I'd have ptsd flashbacks
_______________________
image
1 terms matched
16th Jun 2017, 7:17 AM #7
Gluma

User avatar
Posts: 71
Registration date: 15th Mar 2015
Location: Glorious Mother Russia
(ignore this)

[spoiler]
Lackinganame:Freaken love your style! That must have taken forever to draw! What is that style called by the way?


I don't think there'any particular name for it.
Youre right though, it did take forever, I suck at time management.

[/spoiler]
_______________________
image
1 terms matched
16th Jun 2017, 7:01 AM #8
Gluma

User avatar
Posts: 71
Registration date: 15th Mar 2015
Location: Glorious Mother Russia
Nyomi:


Thanks! I didn't quite expect that lol.

But since you've got to review it, what do you think about writing in dialogues? Every time I re-read them they feel weird and clunky, especially compared to good writing.
_______________________
image
1 terms matched
15th Jun 2017, 9:52 PM #9
Gluma

User avatar
Posts: 71
Registration date: 15th Mar 2015
Location: Glorious Mother Russia
hobo horde is quite a fitting name tbh

also wtf is that, a lazer stomach?
And chainlegs lol. That's a genuinely good idea

------------------------------------------
just click my sig
_______________________
image
1 terms matched
15th Jun 2017, 3:37 PM #10
Gluma

User avatar
Posts: 71
Registration date: 15th Mar 2015
Location: Glorious Mother Russia
I suggest that you add a link to your old thread tbh, just for additional clarity

I think you already did a review for me so asking more would be an ass move (or will it?)

Anyway, keep up the good work!
_______________________
image
1 terms matched
1st Jun 2017, 11:58 AM #11
Gluma

User avatar
Posts: 71
Registration date: 15th Mar 2015
Location: Glorious Mother Russia
lumenite88:Yes, I am, since I only have 2 critiques left to do! :) I just need to clear up my OP.


Add me too, then! Its quite short, won't be too hard ro critique I think.
_______________________
image
1 terms matched
29th May 2017, 10:29 AM #12
Gluma

User avatar
Posts: 71
Registration date: 15th Mar 2015
Location: Glorious Mother Russia
So are you adding more?
_______________________
image
Result in thread: Unrelated Art (Post yours!)
1 terms matched
16th May 2017, 7:51 AM #13
Gluma

User avatar
Posts: 71
Registration date: 15th Mar 2015
Location: Glorious Mother Russia
_______________________
image
Result in thread: Hapy's Critiques
1 terms matched
14th May 2017, 7:57 AM #14
Gluma

User avatar
Posts: 71
Registration date: 15th Mar 2015
Location: Glorious Mother Russia
HapyCow:There will be more, sorry! I've fallen behind on these. Gluma your art is so beautiful, I highly doubt I'm going to be able to mark up any page of yours D: It's like..the Secret of Nimh levels of beautiful. But I can definitely get back to these next week, just need to draw more of my comic and stuff right now.


That's good to hear! I thought you abandoned it.

And thank you very much!
_______________________
image
Result in thread: Hapy's Critiques
1 terms matched
14th May 2017, 7:04 AM #15
Gluma

User avatar
Posts: 71
Registration date: 15th Mar 2015
Location: Glorious Mother Russia
No more? D:
_______________________
image
1 terms matched
7th May 2017, 5:50 AM #16
Gluma

User avatar
Posts: 71
Registration date: 15th Mar 2015
Location: Glorious Mother Russia
Teh evil corporate greed. Shouldn't be too different from the real world indeed.

Those hero guys reminded me the Overwatch (must be all the cyber hero stuff, also that giant emblem)

I'd say though that your lines are quite messy. Totally clean linework is somewhat time-consuming which you don't really want in a webcomic, but its totally possible to make sketchy lines look quite clean and professional. Im not really sure what to suggest, maybe use broader strokes and cover an arc in one motion?

Link in sig (nsfw for gore tho)
_______________________
image
Result in thread: Hapy's Critiques
1 terms matched
2nd May 2017, 9:10 PM #17
Gluma

User avatar
Posts: 71
Registration date: 15th Mar 2015
Location: Glorious Mother Russia
Nice helpful critiques!

Link in sig, pls do, its very short
_______________________
image
1 terms matched
2nd May 2017, 7:57 PM #18
Gluma

User avatar
Posts: 71
Registration date: 15th Mar 2015
Location: Glorious Mother Russia
Roland has some pretty radical attire

Dat face though

Also I'd say baloon composition isn't exactly fitting, its not clear who's talking on spot at panel 2

also why all the lightnings smells of nazi propaganda


------------
click my sig pls
_______________________
image
1 terms matched
23rd Apr 2017, 10:31 PM #19
Gluma

User avatar
Posts: 71
Registration date: 15th Mar 2015
Location: Glorious Mother Russia
Oh, good. I missed it the last time. Hope my 20-something pages will qualify. Link in sig.
_______________________
image
1 terms matched
23rd Apr 2017, 9:45 AM #20
Gluma

User avatar
Posts: 71
Registration date: 15th Mar 2015
Location: Glorious Mother Russia
Just make sure they see good art earlier than older art, this way they'll know that you improved over time.
_______________________
image
Forum > Search results
Pages: [1] [2] [3] [4]


Forum search
Search terms (sep. by spaces)
(Max. 100 characters)