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"Close Calls, But With Death", 26th Oct 2018, 11:46 PM #1
MissElaney

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Location: WOKELAND
u read the title

how many times has some asshole tried to change lanes into your car when you're going 60+ MPH

(that's like what like 95 kph for you BRITBONGS)


discuss
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27th Oct 2018, 12:07 AM #2
swamp
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Ugh. I had that one a few days ago where a Full On Fucking Bus decided to merge right into us. We'd been next to them, so it's not like we missed a turn signal.
I have a lot of dumb close calls where I walked into the street reading and shit because I am a complete moron, but the best writing reference is the way I faint tends to mimic death due to blood loss, which is kinda cool.
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27th Oct 2018, 12:13 AM #3
MK_Wizard

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It was when I discovered I had a food allergy. The lethal way. I am severely allergic to nuts and I can't even touch them without getting hives on my hands at least. I wasn't always allergic though. I ate pizza that had been brushed with peanut oil and then exercised which sped up my reaction and it was full blown. I was swollen all over, I felt hot, my stomach was on fire on the inside, I had hives everywhere, my hair was standing on an end and in the end, I tossed up. I had to get antihistamines through the needle. In that moment, I thought I was going to die. I will never forget the experience.
27th Oct 2018, 12:40 AM #4
Werewolfsbane

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A few months ago I got hit by a car, and had to have my spleen embolized because it ruptured. Ironically, it happened on my birthday.(I’d laugh if everything else about the accident didn’t make me sad)
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27th Oct 2018, 1:00 AM #5
Lutztoons
formerly Laz Neptune
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Yep, fairly recently. We were coming home from visiting my boyfriend’s family and we were going through Indianapolis on the expressway. I was going the speed limit (~60 mph) and coming up over a hill. When the hill peaked and I started coming down, I noticed that a minivan going 20 miles an hour was hanging out in the middle of the road in my lane. No hazard flashers, no flags, no nuthin. They were only a couple hundred yards away from me. It was going so slow that it looked like it was coming TOWARDS my car. I slammed on the brakes and prayed that I wouldn’t smash all the way through the van and kill everyone inside it, and possibly both myself AND my boyfriend.
Luckily, nothing bad happened; my car slowed to a crawl a few meters away from it. I thought I was about to have an aneurysm, I was so rattled.
And to top it all off, the lady inside it was waving me out of the way like she owned the road and it was MY fault I was coming up over a hill going 60 mph and didn’t see her just putt-putting around like it was a Sunday afternoon drive in the park. She was on her gosh diddly damn motherfucking PHONE. Just texting away. It was SO DIFFICULT to resist the urge to give her the most aggressive middle finger in human history. People who text while driving or drive drunk can all go to hell as far as I’m concerned. I really wish I’d gotten her plate number, but I was so upset that I just wanted to get off the road at that point.

Moral of the story: ALWAYS KEEP YOUR EYE ON THE ROAD AND MAKE SURE YOUR BRAKES WORK WELL
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27th Oct 2018, 1:06 AM #6
xianyu118
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some bitch in her fancy ass new car decided to slow down suddenly in the middle of the highway and had the nerve to look affronted at people honking at her for trying to get people to crash and experience a fiery death

and much earlier some old geezer was going in starts in the third lane and just

wow my parents and I had fun trying not to die
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27th Oct 2018, 1:18 AM #7
The Letter M
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In the last few years it's become a serious death trap to drive anywhere because of people using phones at the wheel. When i got my license the only people swerving out of their lanes were the odd drunks, and even then they were doing it consistently. Now a car can be acting fine one minute then drop speed by 20 ks and start veering all over the place. The worst thing is that they notice when people are trying to pass them and they stop for like 3 seconds and speed up.
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28th Oct 2018, 7:30 AM #8
Kyo
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A couple months back my dad, my grandma and I were driving, my dad misjudged the distance on a crossing and a van rammed us from the side, i got flung the fuck around. the van rammed the car pretty much exactly next to the (rear) door where I was sitting, had my dad accelerated a bit slower I woulda been gator mince for sure. It was pretty crazy, we did a full 180 on the road. No one got injured though, none of us and none of the people in the van either. I was staring at a laptop screen at the time too, so I didn't see it comin' or nothing.

I remember right after it happened I let out a couple of screams, I couldn't even help it. Like at that point it was basically all over and we were standing still but it really took me a few moments to compose myself, I was like losing it for a second, I guess just cause of the shock. Then I like felt my limbs and shit just to make sure i'm actually okay, and not horribly injured but too in shock to feel it. Like I said though, everyone was fine. Then I had to spend all day waiting in a hospital room cause they wanted to check out my grandma to make sure she was alright. It was pretty boring and not what i was in the mood for at all. Also my grandma kept asking me what happened because of her dementia and would then get shocked all over again each time I told her we were in an accident. My dad stayed behind to talk to the police about the accident and stuff, in the evening when were finally done with all the scans and shit, I took a taxi home (my grandma stayed behind in the hospital for a day, for monitoring), and the taxi driver started using his phone while on the autobahn, to look up directions because apparently he expected me to know the way (even after i explicitly told him i didn't before we got in the car). I kinda thought it woulda been pretty funny if i got into another accident right then and there

And in the evening when I was finally home, I noticed that I actually had two big old blue marks on my knees, apparently they slammed together so hard that it bruised, they didn't hurt at all though. Same with a spot on the side of my leg, where my elbow hit my leg.

bonus pics of my dads wrecked car
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28th Oct 2018, 11:34 AM #9
felneymike

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Registration date: 26th Apr 2017
Location: Osaka
Never came close to a serious road accident, guess I've been lucky. Have been in / near to a few "fender benders", though. Once I had to do a proper all-four-tyres-smoking emergency stop, only just missing the car in front. Then a dog inside popped up and shook it's head at me like a disappointed father. Also my dad hit the back of a truck once, the front of our car was caved in, the truck's rear step was slightly dented. Oh and when that car was new some bloke reversed into the front of it. He'd turned the wrong way coming out of a holiday camp and just reversed back in without looking. We were kind of dumbstruck to see this car coming towards us round the bend, luckily the damage sprang back that time.
Oh also more recently, living in Osaka, I was cycling furiously down one quiet back-road (Japanese city back roads are completely shared-use and have very slow speed limits, great for safe cycling. I wouldn't touch any British city on a bike), before going round a "chicane" into an even smaller back road. I guess I'd been watching too much Jimmy Broadbent on Youtube and decided to take the chicane like an F1 driver... right into the front of a van coming the other way. Luckily we both stopped before a collision.
Oh and I was in an earthquake that killed 5 people and a typhoon that killed 17 within a couple of months of each other. I didn't even feel the main shock of the earthquake, I was running across the road at the time as the lights were just changing (it was a very wide road). I didn't even know it had been that bad until much later in the day.
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28th Oct 2018, 11:54 PM #10
deerwithgoggles

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a few months ago i had some stupid lady in a van with her kids in the back come within inches of running me down as i was crossing the road (IN A CROSSWALK WHERE I HAD THE RIGHT OF WAY) because she was texting on her phone

i could have died and children could have been traumatized because some broad had to type "AND THEY WERE ROOMMATES" into her phone
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28th Oct 2018, 11:59 PM #11
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i fall asleep a lot while driving. I always jolt away to the sound of either a horn or the rumble strips. Haven't died yet but i'm fairly sure every time this happens I'm only alive due to luck
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29th Oct 2018, 3:13 AM #12
SharpyTheYellowKirby
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I was mad at my dad when I was six so I laid in the road for a while and tried to get hit by a car. Fortunately the truck that came by stopped just in time for my dad to make sure I didn't kill myself over chicken nuggets.
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29th Oct 2018, 11:00 AM #13
Travis

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The craziest brush with death I've had. Nothing happened.

I was driving through a green light at 45 mph, and a blur shot through the intersection at like 80mph in front of me and managed to clear my car by like 3 feet! It was weird driving the rest of the way home and realizing I was almost killed.
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29th Oct 2018, 12:39 PM #14
NiaNook
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One car crash took place on top of one of those bridge/overpass rises. My sister(driving) merged into another lane, and a car speeding up behind us smashed into us. This sent our van spiraling in circles, slamming against the guard rail, and the van tipped (on two tires) OVER the guard rail- enough to where I remember looking out the window to face the long, long drop into all the cars driving below us, and thinking "we're all about to tip over this ledge and die down there on those other cars"

Thankfully, the weight tilted back and our van returned back onto all 4 tires.

Another time, I was 2 years old and was following my mom to the barn one winter. There was this gap under the fence leading to the woods that I tested to see if I could fit through, but I got stuck trying to get back to my mom, so I decided to wander into the woods (with two dogs tailing behind) until I could get to the end of the fence and come home! So some clueless toddler is wandering in the snow in the woods for a couple hours while her mom was calling the cops and people were announcing a lost child on the radio and all that fun stuff.

I remember a helicopter flying overhead. Then sitting down and crying when I felt too hopeless to go on. My dogs kept nearby, apparently keeping me warm by sitting on my feet. But then one dog suddenly got up and bolted off. He came back a moment later with my older brother following behind. If was kinda funny, there were people there outside of the woods acting all friendly and they gave me a teddy bear and I thought they were just some nice people who happened to be there by coincidence. I had no idea this was such a big deal until my mom explained her side of the story years later.

SharpyTheYellowKirby:I was mad at my dad when I was six so I laid in the road for a while and tried to get hit by a car. Fortunately the truck that came by stopped just in time for my dad to make sure I didn't kill myself over chicken nuggets.


o_O Amazing
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29th Oct 2018, 12:54 PM #15
MK_Wizard

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Sorry for not staying on topic. I think my closest call with death while driving was when I was the highway and it was one of those raised highways that's quite a bit off the ground and I'm afraid of heights. The drive itself was smooth and normal, but all of the sudden, someone's bumper just fell off their car and onto the road. It started spinning around like a top towards me really fast and I lost probably ten years of my life from just being terrified. If that thing hit me, it would not only destroy my car, I would lose control, swerve off the road and off the side of it plummeting to my death... but by some miracle, the bumper spun past me and began to slow down so there was no accident for me or anyone.
29th Oct 2018, 10:19 PM #16
MissElaney

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...I think after considering all of your answers I'm going to call this a contest and award it to Sharpy holy shit what the fuck
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One week ago, 3:18 AM #17
Nooga

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My closest call with death was when I forgot to take the rind off some bacon and it got all wrapped in my throat. I had to pull it out like a magician and their infinite hankies. That was a night, I tell ya.
5 days ago, 2:51 AM #18
ShadowLillium

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Probably the closest call from death. or thor. was the time I got struck by lightning. It was easter vacation and was eating chocolate cake in the kitchen. My back was to a window and the window was open. There was a lightning storm going on but it seemed to be gone when we had the window open, but the storm decided otherwise. The lighting came through the window and hit me in the back of the neck, but I think it branched out. All I know was I was looking up and noticing the light above me flickering blue and feeling very tired and stunned(not zapped or punched but just paralyzed for a moment), my mom was there and she got struck also in the back of her leg, but it exited out her arm leaving a bruise.

Only physical sign that it left was a white line on the back of my neck and my hands shaking alot, but i was very lucky cause i lived in a townhouse, so when the lightning struck, it didn't just hit me but hit a bunch of the other houses connected to mine in the process so I did not get the full blow. Took out one neighbor's outdoor lights, another neighbor's computer, and another neighbor's tv.

Worst part about the whole experience is the doctors didnt believe me or mum and it wasnt till around midnight that they finally got my blood work back that they did believe me and a ton of doctors swarmed into the room. Though I am not sure if they were all there to make sure if mum and I was okay or just there to get a case study cause I do not think they experienced this situation before. Didn't really get any long term damage besides small tremors in my hands and same for mum, which for me - means I can't draw a straight line unless vector art or line stablizers on max.
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5 days ago, 3:01 AM #19
Bolderousness

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Swerving on the highway when you're going onto one of those curving bridges above the streets is a moment you never forget. If there was a car next to me, that day would have ended differently. Always pay attention when you drive.

Apparently I also almost died plenty of times as a kid, too. I almost drowned in my swimming pool as a kid twice, having to be saved by a family member. Almost walked into busy traffic as a toddler, having to be saved by a complete stranger who happened to reach me before my parents could ever make it.

I saw death when I went to a water park and went down this virtually vertical slide. I think physically they're designed to where you wont plummet to your death but it scared the shit out of me. Definitely felt like I was just falling to my death.
4 days ago, 4:00 AM #20
BlueDragon

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I got into a wreck back in April. It was lightly raining, I was coming home from work. I was going the speed limit, but going around a semi in the far left lane on the interstate (60 mph.)

A new, black 2018 Malibu was stopped sideways in my lane, lights facing the medium (so even with her flashers on, they were facing horizontally: I could not see the black car sitting sideways in my lane.) I was able to put on the breaks and hit her back left bumper, but a Ford F150 smashed into me a few minutes later and threw my car across 4 lanes of traffic (my car was left headlights facing on coming traffic. That was fun.) Once my car stopped spinning, I thought to myself, "well, this isn't how I thought I'd go out...but maybe it'll be quick at least." I've always has a slight penchant to be stoically melodramatic.

I love Saturns. I did not even get whiplash. I was able to go in to the ER (just to check things out,) and had no damage to my person except some bruising on my breast and my arm. Nigel (my car) was a 2007 Ion. I've had two Saturns (my first car was a 1998 SC-2. Blue was my favorite car, though Nigel came in close second.) I've only been in 2 wrecks in my life (none my fault, not that it matters.) Saturns' strong structure saved me both times. It's anecdotal, but I've known quite a few people whose Saturns got totaled, but they walked away unharmed.

I miss Saturns :*(

Here's poor Nigel at the end of it all:

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