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Forum > Critique > The Guide to a Healthy Relationship Critique
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"The Guide to a Healthy Relationship Critique", 9 days ago, 8:57 PM #1
DaniBoy

User avatar
Posts: 167
Registration date: 25th Mar 2017
Location: Satan's Anus
Hello! I just posted the last page of chapter 4, and would like some general critique to know what to improve on moving forward, if possible. My main concerns are pacing, readability, and clarity as far as characters and story. Although I'm fine with getting feedback on anything that looks wrong, here are some main concerns:

Pacing - Is the story moving too slowly? Or is the pacing all over the place?

Readability - Is the comic readable? Like can you tell what is happening with the visuals, and are the speech bubbles legible?

Clarity - Is it clear what is happening in the story at the moment? Do the characters seem unnecessarily confusing or out of character?

But again, feel free to point out whatever you think needs to be worked on.

Just a quick heads-up as well. My comic is rated NC-17 for nudity, profanity, and substance abuse. It also contains dark themes, so read at your own discretion. Thank you for your time!
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9 days ago, 10:09 PM #2
Thorsby

Posts: 134
Registration date: 14th Nov 2013
I read up to chapter 3, page 28. It feels slow. Like I'm pretty far into the comic and I'm not quite sure what the premise of the comic is, or what's the deal with Julian.

Prologue page 3, panel 2. Can't read the first speech bubble.

Chapter 1, page 3, second last panel. I thought that squiggly line after "It's tasty" was an "n".

Chapter 2, page 9. Panel 1. Not sure what order these speech bubbles are in or which character say which thing.
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9 days ago, 11:11 PM #3
DaniBoy

User avatar
Posts: 167
Registration date: 25th Mar 2017
Location: Satan's Anus
Thank you for the response and feedback! The premise is basically 'An alcoholic tries to figure out what is up with his childhood friend while trying to rekindle their lost friendship', very slice-of-life, not super exciting.

Unfortunately I don't have the time to go back and fix old stuff until I prepare to attempt self-publishing, but I will definitely work on a quicker pace. There are 7 chapters left, so I should get skilled enough to make things more interesting in that time, right?? Lol

But really, thanks, man!
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Forum > Critique > The Guide to a Healthy Relationship Critique
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